I should not have gone over there. What was I thinking? I have just left his house and walked to my car. It was an enjoyable evening with a long goodbye. However living the world that we created for the two of us, makes reality hit. This is not my boyfriend, but I’m acting like he is. He treats me like a girlfriend. I am caught up in that happy bliss, but then I’m reminded that he does not like me nor would he want to date me.

Subtle right? I’m an idiot. Or could this become something in the end? This is dangerous territory to be in. I never thought I would be one of these guys that would like a guy treat me this way without any commitment. I judged these girls. I thought these girls were stupid. I am not this girl.

It’s so typical to think that guys do not think of the consequences of their actions. It’s true. After the first incident of this I said I wanted him out of my life. What changed? It just made his actions and treatment of me okay. Why condone this behavior.

I should probably start my car and drive away instead of debating all of this in front of his house. I start driving and it’s almost like driving from his house with the windy roads and constant stop signs. Like this is going to be confusing territory with stops along the way. One is an exit while one with send you to the confusing back roads where you’ll be trapped. Literally, taking the wrong turn around here sends you in multiple exits with what seems like no way out.

Ridiculous. I now make it to the main road and know it’s easy left turn and straight venture home. Sure there are a few stops and windy roads but not what I just left. Its funny, the further I am from him things are more laid out, there seems to be some sort of plan. Then the closer I get, it’s like I basic thinking is a challenging. Even knowing that makes it difficult to make this turn home.

“Screw it.” I turn and head home to get in my pajamas and curl up in bed reminiscing this night and knowing it was the wrong decision.

“Just jump!”

“Oh funny Kyle, why don’t go go first.” Standing at the edge of this cliff I have been countless times before doesn’t make this any easier. So dark with an almost endless bottom, however there lay rocks below the surface, but safe enough for us to jump. Welp, God is this is how we should meet at least make it epic. All that’s left is to push off this rock. I make the jump and there is the second of fear, joy, bliss, and then you hit the water.

“That was unreal!” I look up and see this huge smile on Kyle’s face.

“I knew you’d love this.” Kyle the pushes off the rocks jumping just to the left of me. I was still afraid he’d land on me but there was a solid distance. His head pops up covered with water running off of it, his hair all flat and all disheveled. He laughs at me and then shakes his hair. Making me turn away from him. I begin to swim to the shore. Not sure of where to go exactly, but I know I want to avoid us being in the water together. Being on land is easier being one on one rather than in the water. I don’t know what could come of this. Did I want anything to happen?

“So you love it?”

“Yeah thank you so much for bringing me here. The beauty here is incomparable.”

“Yeah its not bad.”

“Not bad? Oh man the trees with the view from the rocks. It’s so peaceful. There are very few places in where you could look at and just be in awe of the beauty that surrounds you and just the magic of it all. Only the creator could make this magic. No artist could replicate this nor photograph capture the essence of this.”

“Wow someone’s turning deep on me.”

“Sorry, just don’t understand when things go unappreciated. For example as you the simplicity of this view. You think it’s nice yes?”

“Yeah, so.”

“That’s it. It’s not a negative thing. I’m sure you would see something that I see as nice as something with so much detail that words are solely not enough for.”

“Right. I can see where your coming from.” Sadly I don’t believe him. Maybe he does know what I mean. I shouldn’t be thinking so much about comparing the guys. But it’s so easy. Fantasy verses what’s right in front of you the fantasy tends to win. Kyle is starring of into the distance and something about his face look out into the distance shows me he understands. He does not voice his thoughts and it’s easy to see him doing this is a lot for him. Should it be this much work for him to show who he is?

“Let’s jump again!” We have been sitting at the bottom where you need to climb up.

“Oh now you want to jump again? I jumped like six times before you even went once.”

“So? First you just wanted to jump to show me, then I could tell you couldn’t keep standing still so needed to jump. I like taking my time with things.”

“Right, come on just keep going.” When I get to the top I see across people have started coming but something tells me that we should start making our way down.

“Kyle would you be good if this is our last jump?”

“Sure, thought you’d want to be here for a longer but we could head back.”

“No I want to, just getting a guy feeling we should start heading back.”

“Alright sure.”

Did they think this was my last meal or something? This looks like a meal for about three people. Okay maybe I can eat it all but this is amazing! This would make a sufficient last meal. I wonder if that’s what Jesus thought. Like hey guys could we get a different wine, I want to savior it since I’m dying for all of you. If my mother heard that she would be doing so many prayers right now. But how could you not wonder.

“Eat Brooks.” I know that voice. I turn and see my child hood friend.

“Seth, oh man what are you doing here? Want some food?” I get up we do the bromance hug with smacking each others back to show how close we truly are.

“Brooks how you been my old friend?”

“You know living in Jersey working in the city for a marketing and publishing firm. It’s been good, shouldn’t really complain but can’t help it. How about you. Whatever happened to you traveling the world?”

“Oh I have done a lot of traveling..” I cannot hear the rest of his words because looking into his eyes I see this darkness that has been put in its place that brings chills to my spin. What has happened to my childhood friend? “I came back to the states about a year ago but had been living in Colorado doing rock climbing and of course snow boarding. Remember when we wanted to learn for these girls we thought were so hot?”

“Oh how could I forget? I ended up brakes my arm and spraining her ankle. But I still got her digits in the hospital.”

“Only you man. Now lets eat.” I see him break open the sushi and start eating it. So this should be safe food. Welp if I die at least my last meal was some good sushi. No screw that this taste awful.

“You can never show too much leg. You could show more of those mosquito boobs you have but leg is great.” Monica is video chatting with her sister, whose in Chicago, to help her get ready for the party at Shay’s. She’s looking to impress for the night.

“Trish you sure?”

“Honey you have amazing legs they should be shown to the world.”

“I understand looking good but I don’t want to be easy or a slut.”

“Calm down, I may dress it, you know, slutty whatever but I’m young and single. But you are so conservative. Loosen up a little. You look beautiful. You will turn heads.”

“I hope your right.” Trish goes on to ask all about this boy shoes looking to grab his attention but all Monica says is she’s getting bored with life and feels like she’s seriously missing out on companion ship and hopes to grab some attention to talk to a guy. They leave it on that note but Trish isn’t interiorly convince and Monica does not seem to believe it herself. The right to the party is a blur, Monica is so nervous to see Mike but also not sure if she will. Now she wishes she meet Andrew before hand to not have to walk in a lone.

Monica just stands out the house not sure to walk in. She debates walking in and while starring at the window she hears her name being called. Jay is walking up the driveway with a case in hand. “Ahh that is what I forgot to come prepared for beer in the woods.”

“True, I bring this anytime I come to Shay’s. He doesn’t drink but I feel like the more I bring it sometime he is bound to drink.”

“Wow. Slightly douche.”

“Well, yeah. But I do try to not force it. I just bring it that is all.”

“Then I guess he’s very tolerable.” Monica and Jay just seemed to linger outside of the house. Monica debating to go in a Jay looking like he needs to talk to her. The last encounter was not the best one, and Monica had more than a few choice words to say about it but right now she’s had more on her mind. She’s got a guy on her mind, reading the Bible, and thinking some serious life changes. But let’s have this Jay situation play out.

“If you don’t want to go in a lone I can give you a hand.” Monica gives Jay a once over. Not sure what to say. “I know I am probably not your type but just trying to be a friend here doll.” That gets her.

“I am not your doll. Listen I am not a bitch just going throw stuff so wondering how I even got on this road, this town, and talking to you. Just way to much to think about. Sorry I don’t even know you, but that is why I am standing here and looking at this house and wondering if I should enter.”

“How about I just wait with you. Here.” Jay hands Monica and beer. “Relax a little and we’ll just wait out here.” Monica sits on the stone porch next to Jay and puts her heels next to her.

“So much for showing legs.” Monica says softly.

“What.”

“Nothing just thinking of what my sister would be saying right now.”

“Gotcha, hot many you got?”

“Just her, no brothers. You?”

“I have a brother and a sister.”

“One of each nice.”

“Yep. I’m sure my sister wishes she had a sister but she had two protective brothers instead.”

“That’s nice that your protective.”

“I think so, she doesn’t all the time.” Monica tells him he knows how it is because she’s protective of Trish, especially after they were in a car accident when they were younger. It wasn’t anything major but she promised after that to always protect her. It might not have always been for the best but it was what she knew to do. Jay shared how he’s watch his brothers life always go on the right track and he’s tried to be a good example but he’s brother has turned into his example for his life. Spin on the older siblings role. But his sister has always been the star. She does sports and is at an Ivy League school dating the perfect boyfriend. Her life seems so type A but that is also her personality.

After all there sharing they realize they’ve been outside for a good two hours and drank half the case. Jay figured he might as well bring it in before Shay has to question where all the beer really went. Monica says she’ll wait a minute before going in, she wants to look at the stars which you can’t get a good look at by her. While gazing at the stars Monica feels some ones arm slip around her waist. She does not know this arm but feels as though this is where it belongs. When she turns to see who it could be, it’s Shay.

“Zola what are you doing here?” Desiree ask while coming back through the front door.

“Now I know that is not how your going to talk to me girl.”

“Of course not.” Desiree kisses her hello on both cheeks. “That is how the french say hello.”

“Now you fancy uh’?”

“I try. What did ma'am faint over this time?” Desiree nodding her head in the direction of Taisha still collapsed on the couch. After about the tenth time of her fainting they stopped calling the police.

“Just some gossip. People in this town just talk and sometime your name being dragged around where it needs not to be can be a lot.”

“People are talkin’ about ma’am?”

Zola looks around as if trying to not pay attention or searching for the right words. She has known Desiree since she was young and knows what it was like for her when everyone was talking about her family.

“Zola!”

“Honey calm down. It’s just talk. I would not be too worried about it.”

“Just when they finally stop being quiet when I walk in a room and people finally talk to me, the talking starts up again.”

“Desiree hush now. People are just talking, that’s all. I put them in their place.”

“Zola of course your going to set then straight about our family, they know you are basically family.”

“But they also know I gossip sweetie. If I know the truth I set them straight. Then I also tell them other things to talk about.”

“Zola, what were they saying?”

“It was just talk. Now you know when you she gets like this she’ll need some juice to get sugar in her. Run down to the store and get some juice for her.”

“Zola.”

“Don’t Zola me. Now run a long now and get your ma’am some juice.” Desiree heads out the door and makes her way to the store. Zola starts looking around the home remember where they’re family photos used to be on display. Taisha was a big athlete and all her different sports would we all around the place. While Andre was a big car guy so there would be sneakers and car parts lying a long the wall. Desiree shared Taisha’s love for sports. Even though they were very active and would constantly be on the go, their house always was kept and felt like a home. Now it seems clean with a loss of life.

Suddenly upstairs there is a crashing noise like someone falling. “Now what on earth could that be?” Zola makes her way up stairs with a determination like she’s going to have to set someone straight.

“Shit, shit, shit. Wow that hurt like a bitch. Seriously when will these women leave?”

Zola gets up stairs and hear it coming from Taisha’s room. The door is slightly peaked open and she sees then boy that was over earlier the week. Why is he in Taisha’s room?

“Crap it’s getting so late, I need to get out of here.”

“Boy now what in the hell are you doing in here?” Jeremy jumps and doesn’t know how to react. Zola just stares at him waiting for him to say something. “Now don’t make me repeat myself.”

“I was, umm fixing something.” Jeremy just smiles hoping it’ll make her melt a little to let him just leave.

“Boy wipe that smile off your face. Now what in the hell are you doing in a grown ass woman’s room. She has a daughter. An ex husband who would murder your ass if he found you. Now again, what are you doin’ here?”

“I was waiting for Taisha.”

“Well now you ain’t. Get out of here before someone else finds you.”

“Yes ma’am.” Jeremy looks around to leave but is scared to go towards Zola thinking she might kill him. She then moves out of the door frame and waves her hand on for him to leave. As he’s making his way out Zola she’s Andre making his way to the front door.

“Boy if you want to see another day you’d get back in that closet.”

“I though I would die if I stayed. Well now you see here, Andre - Taisha’s en husband - is making his way to the front door. He wont knock. But if he sees you, he’ll kill you.”

“Getting back in the closet now.” Zola watches him run to the closet and see makes her way back downstairs.

“Taisha, Zola best be gone now so we can finish-”

“Boy don’t think about finishing that sentence.”

Andre jumps and freezes. The only person he’s afraid of is Zola. “Zola we were just talkin’ is all.”

“Talkin’ right. Now you seen she’s all fainted. Desirees gone to get her juice. She’ll be waking up soon. Now with you here wont help but cause commotion, now get goin’.” Andre walks back to the door. “Andre don’t come back to finish anything. Let her be.” Andre doesn’t turn around and just keeps doing through the door.

“He was never much for fightin’ you Zola.”

“Now how long have you been awake?”

“Long enough.”

“Now since you just came out of it I ain’t going to ask you much. But get that boy out of your room and I will give you and hour.”

“You’ve always treated my right.”