New Story, working in progress...

Tilting the snow globe ever so slightly for the golf ball to land on it’s tee and stay. He seems to have it at the perfect level, speed, and the ball is making it’s way up the tee. Then, as it’s about to land, the speed of leveling off the snow globe is too fast causing it to fall off. This task, it what holds his attention during these required hours that he’s forced to sit here.
He enjoys the feeling of his feet against the shag rag. While doing this, he sits on the edge of the couch, which is arched up on the one side, it’s meant for him to lay down and face her while she sits at or desk or at her chair. It’s a nice view, he can look out the window, but that’s not why he’s here. So he sits up right, to avoid engaging and plays with the snow globe each week to get the ball on the tee, it holds his attention. Every so often, after constantly failing he’ll look up at her book shelves to mix it up.
“Chase.” He looks over to her sitting in her chair, legs cross and hands relax on her arms rest as he leans back. “How did this week go?”
Chase turns back to the ball, trying to get it on the tee. Same questions he thinks, there is not real mix to this woman is there? “How did it go?” He says under his breathe but he knows she can still hear him. He continues to play with the tee and fails yet again. He puts it down on the coffee table in front of him, then stands and makes his way across the room to look at her book shelves.
She then turns her chair to be directed at him and watches as he exams her shelves for the up-tenth time. The pen in her hand she starts tapping in the air then chews on the tip slightly. She quickly stops, her habit of chewing on pen caps irks Chase and will lead him into these tangent of questions that she cannot stand. Thankfully she stopped before he turned to look at her.
“What’s this book?” He pulls a book off the shelf that has a red cover with an arrow pointing up then one pointing down.
“It’s called Crazy Love, it’s written by Francis Chan. Do you know him?” She says in a calm voice. Her eyes are holding his and he realizes she’s waiting for him to answer.
Chase puts the book back to where he pulled it from, “I may have heard of him from one of my kids talking about him. Yeah, that’s probably it. Why do you have it?”
“A close friend gave it to me to read and I did, then I read it again. Each time I’ve read it, I’ve been at a different point in my life and each time it has gotten me through that time. I’ve learned a little something new about myself.” Chase is now looking at her and realizing there is not a lie or something in that statement to get him to say something. He doesn’t like it.
Chase moves back to the couch and lays down. He stares at the ceiling with his one arm pulled back to be behind is head and his forearm rest under his head. “How much time is left?”
She checks her watch, “Ten minutes.”
“Well, today didn’t drag on.” He gives a slight smirk and looks at her then back at the ceiling. “Have I told you about my family.”
“A small amount. You’ve shared how you care about them dearly and you couldn’t image being without them. Oh and that you don’t want to lose them.” She continues to look at him while she says all this.
Chase shifts a little while she speaks these words. The words hit him harder than he was thinking, the thought of losing his family. Of all the things she could have said she choose to phrase it with ‘lose them.’ He lets the silence fill the room, time elapsing more so that he can have the final word.
She watches as his face changes, clearly deep in thought. From previous sessions she knows not to say anything, too many questions rattle him and that can set him off. Today he seems calm, like he’s having a good day.
“I wasn’t talking about them.” His words linger in the air, the emotion behind Chase’s words weren’t anger or sadness. He wasn’t even matter-of-fact about his statement. It wasn’t his wife or children that he was talking about. His family that he grew up with. This sinks in to her and now she’s not sure where he’s going with this.
“No Chase, I guess you weren’t. I’m sorry for assuming.” She begins to write and Chase watches her for a while. Her face never changes. She’s always so calm. This let’s him relax. Chase notices the only change is her hair slowly moving in front of her face. Chase watches her move it slowly behind her ear. He sits up and goes back to playing with the golf ball.
“My Dad was a hard ass. No not even a hard ass, he didn’t know how to work. He was a sure piece of work. Do you know what it’s like sleeping under a bridge?” He calmly speaks and plays with the golf ball, still failing to get it on the tee. “Yeah, it’s not a lot of fun. Sometimes Dad decided to not pay taxes, work, or do anything that an adult should do.” Chase pauses and says softly, “It’s not what a Father’s should do.” He almost gets the golf ball on the tee. Chase’s whole body moves slowly, even his legs helping him tilt. The ball falls off the edge. “Yeah, my Mom would be a wreck. When I became a teenager it became easier to leave. The few friends I could reach, they would let me stay over for a night, but when they ran out, that was the only place to turn. Not exactly fun when it’s cold out.”

    Kristina almost chocked on her coffee. “Excuse me?” Kristina’s eyes are bugging out of head while Johnny stands in confusion.
    “I saw what you guys were doing before we came in. You seemed to, umm What would you say Lizzy?” Mitch ask while moving her to have her back towards him and spreading her legs over her lap while having her hands on her hips.
    Lizzy pushes back into Mitch letting her jacket slip more. “You seem like you enjoy messing around.”
    Johnny and Kristina just look at one another awe struck. Both are close to one another but their touching are no longer in a desirous way but Johnny wanting to protect her and Kristina searching for protection.
    Seeing this reaction Lizzy pulls her jacket to be less exposed. “Maybe we were wrong.”
    Mitch stands keeping his hands on Lizzy’s hips, “I thought you guys would want a good time I guess we were wrong.”

    The two couple are now sitting together in the kitchen. Johnny is getting coffee mugs while Kristina is making coffee. Each couple has made the usual small talk and question running wild on both ends. However neither know how the house got booked for both couples. Kristina has been uncomfortable by the way the man entered and let Johnny do most of the talking. They seem friendly enough but something about them just made her skin crawl.
    “So have you two come here before?” Johnny says while handing Kristina the mugs.
    “Ehh, different places in the area. This was our first time to this place.” The man looks around the room seeming to scoop it out. Although he was eyeing Kristina in a way that he seemed to know what she would look like naked.
    Johnny catches his glare and not sure how to react or if he could just be over sensitive to this guy because he interrupted them. The moment where they left off is still running through his mind. Having this be a primal thought is just making Johnny’s desire to have them out fast is more critical. “So you come here often them and stay in the area.”
    “Something like that.” The girl says with a slight smile leaning forward exposing more of her cleavage and letting them know that under her coat she was not wearing a shirt or a bra. Both Kristina and Johnny take not of this which makes Johnny turn to get milk from the fridge while Kristina gets a little turned on wishing her and Johnny’s moment wasn’t interrupted. She knows she’s being a bit of a tease and turns to her man smiling while rubbing his thigh.
    “Then are you from the area?” Kristina asked to distract herself from her own desires.
    “The area.” The man said not putting to much into his answer.
    Johnny comes along Kristina putting his arm around her waist while handing the coffee over to the two who have now joined the cabin. There is still a silent tension in the air. Johnny and Kristina just want to go back to where they were interrupted. The invading couple can see this and it makes the woman move to her feet and make her way around the counter.
    “Is this your anniversary? A regular place you both come to?” The girl says as she moves closer to the couple. Resting her head on her hand and bending down to have her booty pop out showing how great her leather pants and heels make her legs look. It easily distracts both Johnny and Kristina that he can’t help but move his hand to get a touch of bare skin. She notices the slight movement of Johnny which makes her smile.
    “Both. We came here for our first vacation as a couple before we were married so now we come at the same time every year.” Johnny plus Kristina in a little closer to him which causes her to look up and smile at him.
    “Yeah, it is one of our favorite spots. What makes you guys come here.” Kristina looks back and forth between the couple.
    “We like the area and the houses aren’t too bad. Mitch introduced me to the area.  He’s been bringing me around here for years.” She moves around the table to sit on Mitch’s lap while he doesn’t hide his hand moving on her thigh to rest between her inner thighs.
    “Yeah I thought Lizzy would like it here. She seems to hold her own.” Mitch says looking at Lizzy as though they were alone making Johnny and Kristina feel as though they were invading.
    “Don’t you want to join?” Lizzy asked still holding her eyes on Mitch.

    Seeing Kristina walk down the stairs in her baggy sweater and a high bun, Johnny is in awe of how beautiful she is. Yes, he enjoys when she gets dressed up but dressed in her natural beauty is what always catches Johnny’s breathe. The cold chill outside brings him back to his task but he know he could stand there and watch her all day.
    “Sure is coming down outside.” Johnny brushes the snow off his one shoulder that’s holding the wood he collected from outside. Moving it to be next to the fire place so they have extra through out the night. Kristina just watches him from the couch curled up under a blanket and resting on a pillow.
    “Did you get the bags?” She’s now scanning the room looking for some layers to add rather than just swearing her sweater.
    “I thought you were getting dressed upstairs? The bags were in the room.” Johnny now moves to curl up next to Kristina on the couch.
    “Oh right. I might have forgotten.” She moves to straddle him moving the blanket over them. Johnny’s hands move to her hips moving up and down her leg. “I enjoy when you do that.”
    “Oh trust me, I know.” Johnny just smirks at Kristina then leans forward to kiss her.
    “Now, board game or movie?” Kristina asks while she plays with the buttons on his shirt.
    “That’s not going to lead to either option.” Johnny started moving his finger tips up and down.
    “I know.” Kristina begins to move in to kiss Johnny when suddenly the door flings open.
    “That drive was ridiculous!” A man walks into the room with bags brushing off snow. “Honey come on hurry up!”
    “Excuse me?” Johnny yells to the people entering the house while moving Kristina off his lap and giving her the blanket to cover herself.
    “Someone’s here?” The man looks in the house taking off his hat and having a face of utter confusion.

It all starts in to local coffee shop. Many people use coffee shops to get to know a person and see if there is a chance for a relationship. That is the traditional way to look at things. Well, this was a first time grabbing coffee to share how a relationship was not going to happen.

“I just asked you to go there because I thought you would enjoy it. There was not alternative motive.”

“The way you were talking about it and plans made it come off that you were planning it for just us and had planned for it to mean more.”

“Yeah I thought it would be something that we could do, but I was the one asking.”

“Yeah I know you asked.”

“Right. I am the girl. Me asking, not you. If you had asked it would have been different. There would have been a thought process of maybe this is more than just friends, but it was me.”

“I know, but you made it sound like you wanted more to come out of it.”

“How?” I shift in my car in a slight confusion trying to remember the conversation we had of me asking him to go. I talked it up in excitement because I have good memories of the place and honestly thought he would have really enjoyed going to it.

“You just kept saying how I would enjoy it and didn’t seem like you wanted anyone else to go.” He just sits there seeming so uncomfortable and awkward.

“Honestly that is just how I am. I like getting to know people and building relationships with them so I spend time one on one time with them. In a group you can’t do that. There are just others and distractions, it just makes it hard. I don’t really know what you want me to say. You don’t really know who I am or much about me so you just assumed these were my attentions.”

“Well . . . you would joke about us dating.”

“I also told you it would never work out for us to date.”

“I know.”

“So apparently me thinking we would never date and telling you it wouldn’t work out clearly means that I want to date you.”

“That’s not what I said.”

“I am just trying to understand.” I am trying to hold back my defensive tone but he isn’t being rational. His responses are coming off so quiet and as though he is uncomfortable and doesn’t believe what he says. “If you are making accusations about me liking you and wanting more you should be able to back up your thinking.”

“I just . . . I got, I just got this feeling so I stopped it before it went further.”

“Okay.”

“Yeah so anyway how’s your coffee?” Seriously? This guy really has no back bone.

“It’s good. Listen I am getting kind of tired and I cam here to talk to settle things but you don’t seem interested in doing that.” I begin to move off the seat and he still is just staring at me. Is he really this dumb?

“I thought we did.”

“Do you not talk things out to make them better?”

“I never have before no.”

“Seriously?”

“No. I haven’t.” He just stares and me and shrugs his soldiers like I’m the crazy one/”

“Wow. That is ridiculous. Have you not had a friend you’ve wanted to talk things out with, or even a girl you liked or liked you?”

“I don’t. I just don’t talk about it or to them really and then we just start talking again.”

“Wow that’s really immature. Sorry but it’s true.”

“Thanks.”

“Well, umm, when you want to talk, then reach out, but for now I am not going to waste my time just pushing something under the rug that you brought up. It may seem like I am making a big deal about this, but I can’t believe you brought this up and didn’t expect to talk about it.”

“I just don’t.”

“Just don’t what?”

“Talk about things. I get over it and that’s it.”

“Yeah, well when you have an issue with a person you need to say something to them.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” I have no idea what to say or think in this situation. Am I being defensive or a typical girl and over thinking things? He’s making me feel like the crazy one. I break my muffin in half contemplating this. He sits there tapping on his drink with his fingers. Just tapping, making no noise but just a distraction in the silence of awkward that has just transpired. 

I shift to cross my legs the opposite way leaning back to pull the wrapper off the bottom half of my muffin. Chocolate chip muffins from dunking are always softer than a bakery or bagel shop makes them. It is harder to break and harder to eat. Why did I even get a muffin? The donuts are good enough and I wouldn’t mind having a Boston creme. Ahh my thoughts are all over the place.

Rachel get your head straight. “So how’s that muffin working out?”

“It’s working. I don’t know about the good or bad. Kinda making me think why I didn’t just get a donut.”

“You can still get one.”

“I’m good.”

“Okay, well if your not happy with something you can change it.” Oh the irony.

Douche! That is the main thing going through my mind when I pull into my garage. You know happy thoughts of course. I was so happy having a lovely day, well okay maybe wasn’t the best because I have been super moody but I was on the upswing to be happy and things looking up for a brighter night that I was even considering going out tonight. Not a big thing but I was out of my funk. So I tell him that I am thinking that I’ll end up going over. He says this other girl is coming whose ‘just a friend’ so it’d be better if I don’t. Come again? Was I know the girl you were making out with the other night? Obviously I should be the one told to not come over.

Douche! I am just staring at my steering wheel, I somehow had the thought process to turn off my car and take my keys out. Stomping up the steps from my garage into my house I move past the people, it is as if they are figures and I do not know how we got to where we are now. One minute things are great! Okay let’s be real maybe it wasn’t great, or good for that matter. Maybe it just was. But just was, was better than what it is now. When I look at him I feel disgust. No, I don’t even look at him or think of him. Well, I do think of him that is a lie because he is what’s fueling this intense productively.

A guy. A silly boy is what is fueling this crazed let’s get work done and over drive mentality. He is only a boy because he is not a man so a boy is fitting. You can be the age of a man but not act or have the attitude of one. That is besides the point. One of the biggest tensions between a guy and a girl is whether they like one another or not. The closer they get, the more confused they get. There are connections that are made, an unspeakable bond you could say. Knowing how the other thinks, their past, and them talking about your future. The future makes it come off as though they will be in each others futures in a different way.There is something special and different about this one. They say guys and girls cannot be just friends. We should have listened. Getting to this level of being so close that it almost seemed inevitable. 

No. I was a strong woman. I knew where my head was at. I was focused. We said just friends. There were to be no feelings or any sort of connection. That is what we agreed on didn’t we? Then how did I let this happen? I gave in, I gave in, I gave, I have feelings for you. This wasn’t supposed to happen. You know too much about me, I know so much about you. I can’t like you. I choose not to like you. It’s so hard when you smile at me the way you do. I told you it was distraction and now I feel like a smile never leaves your face. These little distractions. All sweet and innocent.

Where is that silly notebook. I need to get all this out of my head. It is all trapped in here. It is making me go mad! I need it out. A release of pen to paper is like a drug. A crazy, mad unspeakable drug. Where the, oh of course next to my bed. Why would I be rummaging through these draws to my desk that just end up with things thrown in them? I have no idea. I just think I just needed to slam things.

“Hey, umm is everything okay?”

“Whose that?”

“Well Rach is you turn around or would recognize your roommate of the last twenty years you’d know it’s your sister. What’s wrong.”

“Sorry Gen. I just have had a horrible day and need to write it out. So unless you want me to project it on you let me get it out on paper, burn it and be done with it then we can talk.”

“I think before talking we’ll need some wine.”

“That too. And chocolate.”

“Yes.”

“No screw that this silly thing is not getting me down. I am going for a freaking long ass run. A run to trump all runs. I am not going to do the stereotypical girl thing of curling up in a depressed ball and giving into my feelings. Screw that!”

“Okay.”

“Now get out let me right and then run.”

“Good luck with that.”

Gen slowly closes the door behind her leaving me to my thoughts. Thank God! I love my sister but she will simply complain if I at all complain to her because she has told me from the beginning I am being stupid with this guy and she just doesn’t like him. Maybe she’s right. No, she was right. I don’t know why I’ve been waiting around and for him this long. What’s so great about him anyway? Umm, yeah I’m going to need time to answer that one.

Where was I? Oh right DOUCHE! DOUCHE! DOUCHE! Ehh where to even freaking begin? Umm yeah it’s great you made your big move, congrat - u -freaking - lations! You can make out with a girl but you can’t do the follow through. Honestly guys think they can do anything they so please with anyone and that in the end it was the girl thinking to much about it all. But come freaking on! If there was never a conversation about dating, something happens, and then you talk okay yeah understandable. There was conversations. Yes, plural. Many. More than one. So seriously what were you thinking?!

Obviously there is a back story to all of this. I will not go back to the very beginning, that is simply too much of a backstory to this whole melodrama stupidity. Let’s set a scene for the beginning of the summer. Everyone like the summer, it’s fun easy and relaxed right? Well, this summer seemed to start off at just a little preview for how this relationship was going to play out and just grow into greater confusion.

That was not a good idea! running. Why on earth did I think I could possibly a runner. I must has made it about five minutes if that before question what I was doing. Run? Okay playing a sport yes I will but to just go for a run. I walked. But walking is so slow and people feel as though they can stop you. And of course the moment I need to clear my head I would run into the person I need to figure out.

Not the new guy. If it was the new guy then that wouldn’t be so bad. However it just had to be Kyle. Him of all people. I think maybe running into, I don’t know, no solid comparison on who would have been better to see. Right now nothing is clicking in my mind.

Who do I have a roommate? I know that she believes that she is helping but really? Ahh and talking to him! It was like pulling teeth because I knew he totally knew about my roommates grand idea of us being set up. But he probably thinks it me who wants to go out on a date with him. Being so coy, oh I heard your roommate ran into Andrew earlier. Really?! I should not be this upset about it all. Right? My reaction is not justified. Or is it? Why am I getting this upset over everything? She said that we were all going to grab food or something. Or something. He knows the or something.

Maybe it was the way he said it or just me not wanting anything and knowing, or at least being told many times how he wants something. People playing with my head never ends for a good time. I am being such a women. I just need a friend to talk to. Wait where am I? I just kept walking after seeing Kyle in a storm and now it looks like I went to a foreign country. Okay turn around that seems like a good plan. Yes just turn around. I turn to actually do a little running so where I am can pass by quickly and hopefully I am not in a dangerous area.

“What can’t get enough of me?”

“Clearly not!” New guy what are you doing here?

“Well actually I can’t say that because I saw you a while back but you were walking so fast making it hard to catch up to you.”

“Oh sorry, lot of the mind so just kept going and now I need to question where I am and how I got here. Thankfully I don’t think I made any turns so that’s good.”

“Oh well that helps.”

“Yeah.”

This is totally an awkward silence moment. Was he just stalking me?

“Well my building is actually about two doors down, if that gives you any reference for where you are.”

“Honestly not at all.”

“Figured.”

“Yeah but I believe if I keep walking but up that way I shall eventually come to a reference point. Or at least that is my plan of the moment, but who knows.”

“Sounds like a reasonable one.”

“Yeah.” So is this another awkward moment of me putting in head phones and walking away? “Oh funny thing is I have talked to you about three times and I have never asked your name.”

“Oh I don’t believe I have offered it up, so that is rude on my behalf.”

“Yeah but, no will agree to that simply people curtsy.” Oh God please laugh.”

“This is true.” Okay I got a smirk that’s something. “Well I am Nathan it is lovely to have meet you, and again.”

“Well Nathan it is my pleasure.”

“What brings you down here? I am assuming you don’t live around here.”

“Well that is up for debate seeing how I am somewhat from around here however I do not know where exactly here is so, yeah.”

“Well here is about three blocks from the metro where I saw you the other day.”

“Oh okay awesome, so I am not as far as I thought. Sorry caught up in these thoughts in my head so I could have been dropped in some foreign country probably without realizing.”

“This could be a foreign country and I am simply tricking you.”

“Now Nathan why would you do such a thing?”

“I have no purpose. No clue what I was thinking.”

“Heaven only knows.”

“Fact. I am sorry though I must run. You know those Tuesday ragers won’t happen without me.”

“Oh yes clearly they only happen due to you.”

“I am glad someone understands.”

“Yes.” We do smiles and I walk past him putting in my head phones. I guess random banter is where this relation shall stay.

“Olivia?”

“Yeah?”

“Your going the wrong way.”

“Oh, ha. Thanks!” And embarrassment. Grand! 

After about two bottle of win roommate finally calmed down. Thankfully she didn’t go out. I hope she stays in for the day. Maybe it is an upside to not being employed. Where is this train? The platform to this place seems to get grosser everyday but there is just something about the metro that makes me appreciate it. Normally I am not as antisocial as I am now, not like I go up and talk to strangers but I don’t wear head phones and sunglasses while going place to place. But after barely sleeping and waking up it was needed, plus Adele just seemed to be speaking my language today.

Now don’t instantly think girl problems and need to hear broken women songs. That is not the case. Just a soulful voice with a message and good beat. I just-whose touching me? 

“Olivia?” I pull out my head phones, take off the glasses and see the new guy.

“Hey, how are you?” He goes in for a hug and without realize I hold me breathe. My heart begins to race and head slightly spin.

“Been good, started packing but then something told me to not go, so I called off leaving and been here.”

“Oh wow! That’s crazy.”

“Yeah, bosses weren’t really happy, or the buddy I was suppose to be living with, but then it just pushed him to take this girl he’s been seen for years with him. So guys everyones made happy.”

“Seems to be that way.”

“Yeah, what about you?”

“Been the usual work grind, figuring out life, you know the works of being twenty four.”

“Ahh yes what it is to be young!”

“Ha, yes young. If only my mind was not that of a fifty year old person. I go to bed at eleven the latest and my roommate thinks I’m insane.”

“Wow eleven, what a crazy thought!”

“I know, getting a little crazy.”

“My roommates are the same. Well he was, keep forgetting he’s now in Canada. But I would want to stay in if I’ve had a long day and just relax with a book or do some drawing and he would think I was the strangest person.”

“Reading?! Who does that anymore?”

“Weird people I guess.”

“Funny story with that. Roommate comes out of her room all ready for this new trendy club while I’m sitting drinking tea and reading. Should could not hide no matter how hard she tried to hold back her judge face.”

“Well then the life of the educated instead of the young.”

“I guess.” Now the train comes. “This you?”

“No I’m the next one.”

“Alright well it was good to run into you again.”

“Yeah same.” Now I go to put my head phones back in and make my way to the train. “Wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t forget your shades.”

“Oh thanks.” How did he get my shades? Guess I’ll awkwardly smile and continue on my way.

When I finally get to my seat I look out and he looks so confused. “What just happened?”

Sorry for the wait

You’d think I would learn my lesson the first time. I grew up being a simple kid from the suburbs, went to college, and now have a job in the city. Basically what your told in high school the life you should have and many people try to reach that bar. Now I’m here sitting in my car dreading those minutes ticking down for me to walk into my office and ask how the eff did I get here. Look at my other coworkers walking in. They car pool. All like they’re friends and truly love their lives. It makes me sick. Guess I should get out of my car and head in. Look at my car it’s even a freakin’ BMW. I am the clique of what life I was told to live. I could be all suave and walk in with shades, lock the car behind me and own this building. But I know this building would be an easy hot shot and I could sleep with any girl I choose. Now I’m not a cocky guy but for this office I am one of the people who have a life out of the office, I work out, and I do a lot of volunteer work so I am a freakin’ catch.

The thing is women working in this office have no lives outside of work. All day they work and may go out one weekend night and it’s to blow off steam with girls they party with. Partying women, well they shouldn’t even be called women they are actually girls due to their actions, do not have true friends and don’t know how to be a friend. Why waste my time? Goodness. Take the elevator and be trapped with someone in it and either talk or stand in silence, I’ll that the stairs. This way it is passing by people not chit-chat and these people wouldn’t walk the stairs even if the building was on fire. I know sounds like a stretch but kids with trust-funds come from their own little world. I worked my way here, I commute from Jersey. I place these people probably think traveling from they need shots or something.

One floor down now only five to go. Sure I may be late to my desk but coming from the stairs looks better. My boss will simply look at me ask about the weather or something and then give me two task to do. routine is his thing. Three floors down, three to go. I wonder what could be on the menu this morning for breakfast. Maybe a muffin, or a bagel. Oh the options. Sixth floor. Made it, here goes nothing.

“Back away!” A police man is pushing everyone to the side. I see blood on the walls and shattered glass everywhere. Women crying and people puking. What just happened?!

“Nice house.”

“Why thank you.” Shay releases his arm from around Monica waist and turns to look at her. “What brings you to the woods.”

“Andrew actually asked me to come here, but I have yet to see him.”

“He’s actually inside. Want to come in.”

“I do but it’s so beautiful here. Sorry we don’t views like this from my apartment.” Monica just continues to gaze up at the stars as if nothing else exist.

“That’s why people come to the woods, it’s something I like to call camping.”

Monica can’t fight back a smile. “Ha, ha. Very funny.” The two simple continue to stand outside neither wanting to turn or move just being comfortable with the silence. Shay turns to Monica about to say something while someone beats him to the punch.

“So you do make it out here.” Mike is coming down the stairs holding a Mike’s which isn’t exactly mainly but Monica can’t help the girlyness of the drink.

“I can get away from my comfort zone.”

“What brings you here?”

“Andrew asked me to come.”

“Right. Did you get to read over my folder?”

“No.” Which is a lie Monica read over every detail Mike left and started making an outline of what to send back to him and where he should look.

“Oh I guess your really busy then.”

“No. Just not sure what kind of read I get from you and it makes me question working with you. Sure it’ll have your name to it, but my name will also be out there.”

“Ahh yes your precious name.”

“Sorry to interrupt but do you guys need a moment?” Shay is starting to back away unsure of where this conversation is coming from or what is with all the tension that came into the air.

“No, Shay you can stay out here with Mike I was just heading in.” Monica goes p the steps and makes it to the door frame when Mike is suddenly next to her. “Can I help you.”

“Yeah, I think I want to take you out for a date.”

“I’m not the kind of girl you think of doing something with. You either have the balls to ask or you don’t.” Monica just steps into the party leaving Mike at the door.

Monica went to work spoke to Tony as she entered. Shared with him what she had read and what chapters had changed her view. Still unsure of what all these things mean to her, Tony simple shares for her to not rush it and to continue reading. He is no expert so tell her to seek a place out that she feels called to. Monica agrees to this and heads to her office. Before looking for a place that calls to her, which she is unsure of what that could possible mean, she does the research she promised to do for Mike.

“What is with this thing?” Monica is clicking all over her computer for the website she uses for simpler researching of fundraisers and it does nothing.

“Bad time?” Monica turns to see Mike standing at her office door.

“Oh no, sorry just trying to actually look up the information I said I would do for you.”

“Ahh, well thank you so much. I did some of my own.”

“Awesome. I honestly meant to do this for you yesterday but life gave me a slap in the face so I had to put it off.”

“Alright. In a good way.”

“You know I think so.”

“Well that’s always good.” Mike unsure of what to continue on saying goes and hands the folder he’s brought with all the research he has done.

“Oh right, getting straight to business. Listen not sure what your expecting to do or anything-”

“I have everything laid out there with my ideas. Read it over and give me a call.” Mike just turns and head to the elevator. Monica is unsure how to think of this. Should she follow him or, she’s up and heading to him.

She catches him at the elevator, “that’s it?”

“Excuse me?”

“Your just going to walk all the way to my office, hand me this, and then be done?”

“Monica I know your business didn’t mean it in a rude way. Honestly.” Mike looks serious at Monica and questions lingering on his face of wondering why she’s so hurt by what just happened.

“I’m sorry. I guess I am just, I, there is just a lot of my mind. I will read this over and give it back to you.”

“Thanks.” The elevator opens and Mike steps on in. Gives an awkward wave and the door shuts.

“And that lady and gentlemen is how you make a complete and total ass of yourself.” Monica phone goes off with a text from Andrew, done for party tonight at Shay’s? Shay is friends with Mike, Monica just made an ass out of herself to him. Probably not. I’ll be there.

Sorry June I am failing with posting.

The next day Monica wakes up slowly. Taking her time just rolling over and looking around her room. She gradually gets up. Rolls out of bed a groggily goes to her bathroom to get ready for the day. She sees that she laid in bed for a half hour so she will barely make a work out. With the pace that she is going out she’s lucky if she makes it in time for work. After checking herself in the mirror she doesn’t look too bad but she wants to wash away the night of tossing and turning of thinking about Mike. It makes no sense to her how a guy could just walk into her apartment and she could easily talk to him for hours about anything.

The heat of the water starts filling up the room. Monica turns to make her way for the shower but freezes remembering that she has to do all the phone calls for fundraising so she will get to talk to Mike later. Suddenly feeling pleased with the situation Monica gets in the shower and uses her good body wash, showers her hair and begins to sing. Gets out the shoer dries of and then turns up music to start dancing and getting ready for the day.

Monica makes her way to her bed and is jumping in her robe to the music and singing. Watching this all in Andrew who just walked in with morning coffee for Monica because she’s giving him a ride to work. “So this is what you now do in the morning.” Monica now becomes paralyzed. Slowly turns around in horror. As soon as she sees it’s only Andrew she relaxes and jumps off the bed to greet him.

“Way to scare a me. Goodness I thought you were a rapist or something.”

“What? Yes, a rapist would announce himself first.”

“Shut up! Thanks for the coffee.” Monica gives him a kiss on the cheek. “Now please step out I will throw on something and join you on the couch.”

“Alright. How are you not ready? Did something happen last night.”

“Oh you know the usual. Boy comes to my place, let himself in, set something up to help him, and then have a really deep conversation.” Monica begins to shyly walk off letting Andrew swallow what was just said.

“When did this happen?”

“Last night.”

“Right. Well... umm. Who was it?” Andrew is getting off the couch and making his way to the kitchen to make himself look busy.

“Mike. I forgot I told him I would talk with him, slightly embarressing but it was a good time.”

“Good. Listen I would love to hear more but completely forgot I’m meeting a client.” Walks over to Monica. “Give me a call later.” He grabs his coffee and makes his way to the door.

“Okay. Have a good meeting.”

“Thanks.” Andrew exist leaving Monica in a robe with coffee on the couch.

“Well that was weird.” Monica doesn’t let it phase her and gets ready for the day and puts the music back on.

I’m sure you enjoyed my awkwardest state. But now with this story. I never wanted to date someone who isn’t my friend first. Honestly, world wind romances don’t last, and are so last season. It is not simply a friends with benefits thing either that is just so not classy. I want to marry my best friend and have them be with me everyday. I understand the concept that guys and girls cannot be just friends. They can if you realize they cannot be your best friend. Now let me start off the with the story of wilderness guy, is all started on a stormy night of me needing a rescue, this guy can out of no where and saved my life! No serious I’ll stop playing no night in shining armor simply your average joe, meet at an even thrown by my siblings friends where I knew no one. I clung to my siblings but saw this guy who seemed pretty quit and like he was in the same boat. So I made my way over and say hi.

“Hi, I’m Mike.”

“Mike? Nice to meet you I’m Monica.” We shake hand as a sign of meeting and acknowledgment. 

“What brings you out to the woods?”

“Well my siblings know the people here so I tagged a long. You say that like it’s a bad thing or something.”

“Oh no I didn’t mean it that way at all!”

“Okay good. But this is a pretty sweet set up they have here. I’m sure you could go riding anywhere.”

“You ride?”

“I know the dress and sandals don’t really play a part of a riding girl but I do.”

“Oh just don’t meet many girls that do ride.”

“Yeah people generally don’t get it, I was the only girl that rode at my school growing up. But we also lived in the suburbs so not a lot of places to go.”

“Oh yeah I don’t live around here but this is my friends place so we come here on the weekends.”

“This would be awesome to go riding. Do you ride quads or dirt bikes.”

“Well I borrow a friends bike.”

“Better than what I got, parents got ride of my stuff a few years back so now I just appreciate those who can still ride.”

“Nice.”

“Hey Mike.” I turn and see this guy I swear is Mike’s age, maybe a little taller, and slightly hickish. 

“Hey man.” I am not sure about what to do they are both slightly starring at me. But this does not phase me. I come from a large family and slightly out spoken.

“Hi I’m Monica.” I put my hand out for an introduction. He shakes it.

“Hi. So Mike are you coming here tomorrow? Frank got a new mountain bike and wants to break it in.”

“Yeah I’m down with that.” They both just nod. I give I little glance over the crowd. No one really seems interesting.

“So I’m guessing one without a name you ride too.”

“Yeah.”

“Right and your not one for the art of conversation.” I now I must come off as a major bitch right now but seriously who just shakes a girls hand, talks to the person they’re with about plans and doesn’t offer up a name? Like come on. Okay I will try not to interrupt the story again.

“Umm. I just wanted to check with him for plans tomorrow. Sorry I’m Shay.”

“Nice to meet you say.” I then smile and just walk away.

Welcome to the girl who got too much for the nice guy. I did like them don’t worry. One I truly had a crush on. From the moment I meet them I thought they were attractive. Being who I am I went straight up and started talking to them. One in particular was quit shy which I found adorable. SO I tried getting him to talk. He was a wilderness type of guy. It made me smile knowing he was basically innocent. I know sometimes they’re boring or they’re way too innocent that it just turn a girl off making you think they’re a child. But no this was simply adorable.

The next nice guy I thought was a little awkward and slightly a bit of a douche. But simply hard to get his humor. Oh goodness the kid I want to share more but I will let you form your own opinion of him.

Finally come the funny boy. Now this funny boy is legit refreakin’-diculous.. He has such an adorable smile, like I can’t even tekk you how adorable it is. Like when he smiles all I can do is smile. You know what that’s like.

Well this story revolves all around these three boys. Thankfully I have never hung out with all three of them at the same time. Well I can’t say that. We may have been in the same room but at large events. Never like out on the weekends together.

But let me giggle for a moment to let you know my life right now as I write this on of the boys I speak of is about fifteen feet away from me grabbing coffee with a girl. I just want to seriously laugh but I’m all a lone so it would be supper weird. If only I had a guy on call I could call right now. Oh fail.

Driving

“Did he seriously ask me about my drinking? Josh I was seriously about to smack him.”

“Well that’s awkward.”

“Thanks.” Why do I even bothering talking to him about this stuff?

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Talk to yourself in your head like no one else is able to give you good advice. I’m right here. You can talk to me about stuff. Don’t shut me out. I talk openly to you, and you did it to me as well. But somethings when you don’t hear something you like you tune the world out. Yes, what he said to you was awkward.” I am not responding. I know that break is you expecting me to respond coldly or defensive but no. I am just going to sit and hear you out. “He is simply trying to get a read on you. Maybe he wants to be just friends as well but is trying to have you say it instead of being a man and saying it himself. He seems scared.

“He is looking for something to be said between you two to protect himself. Your a strong girl and will do as you want with out letting the world know how it has faced or hurt you. But when you are dating someone those rule no longer apply. You have to be able to be open with them and tell them what is going on in your head.”

“We went on one date that is not the same.”

“I am not talking about him anymore. I’m talking about me.” Why is he talking about himself? We’ve never dated you. “I know we haven’t gone on a date but I really care about you. I want to see where this is headed. Kelly you have to know how hard this is for me to even bring it up to you. Going over to your house. That might have seem rash to you. But I had to do it. You had to know how I felt.”

“Josh stop.” I pull over to the side of the road. I see the turn I have to make to make this all end. Just that last turn up a head and I could just drop him off and this night be all over with. “You can’t be saying these things to me. I can’t.” I just look at my lap with my hand on the stirring wheel still. I now look Josh in the eyes. “I care about you a lot. But he is your friend too. I can’t do that to him. Not when he’s trying to get his head around everything. It is just too soon.” I feel myself moving closer to him without being able to stop myself. He grabs my head and we just stare at each other. Words cannot give this moment justice. My hand is on fire from feeling everything to want to be closer to him now forget about the world. Have it just be the two of us and be lost in this moment.

“Get it!” We both jump and turn to see some random guys walking past the car. I clear my throat and turn back and the road to make that turn for his house. Josh takes his time to leave. He turns back as he goes to leave and gives me a kiss on the cheek. My body freezes with chills all over.

“You can give him time but you have to know you’ll choose me in the end.” He gets out and goes into his house. I’ve heard that before. The nice guy when he heard about what my ex did to me.

Driveway

“I need an answer.”

“A answer about what?” Showing up to my house this late is craziness. What is he thinking?

“Are we just friends?”

“Josh?”

“Yeah.”

“Why are you asking if we’re just friends?”

“Because I like you. I think you have made it pretty clear that you like me too.” I look around to make sure the nice guys left. He has. Okay time to be honest. “Who are you looking for.”

“You know the guy I was just with?”

“Yeah.”

“Him because he just took me out on a date and I don’t want him to hear all this. You like me?”

“Yeah.”

“Never told me.”

“I thought I made it clear. What always so happy with you around. Asking you to do things wasn’t enough?”

“Considering you do that with a lot of girls. Girls that your not even interested in, I would say yes.”

“You still should have known.”

“False.”

“Fine I’m leaving.”

“You drove to my house for that and your just going to leave?”

“Yeah because I don’t want to seem like an idiot. You should have known how I felt about you. This is ridiculous how could you not have known?”

“Actions speak louder than words.” Turning for my house to walk in next thing I know he’s grabbing me and giving me the most intense kiss I have ever gotten. When I finally open my eyes he’s getting in his car and driving away.

“Maybe this is a bad time.” Who the eff is that? I don’t want to turn around. I am in way to much shock to register whose voice that even is. Crap I have to turn around. Slowly. Oh ever so slowly. Ryan?

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

“I came to talk to you because I know your seeing my best friend and wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh god. I didn’t know that was going to happen. He just dropped me off and when I was walking to my door Josh showed up.”

“I wont say anything. But you should. Listen I know he doesn’t seem like a really special guy or anything but he just has a lot of learning to still do to feel comfortable one on one with a girl.” I seriously cannot be talking to anyone about this right now. “I know you like him, but he will be the one getting hurt not you.” Really need to stop talking right now. “Are you serious about leaving?”

“Leaving?”

“When your done with school do you really want to leave?”

“Yeah.”

“Thanks.” That’s it. He just turns now and walks away. Thanks for all the mind fucks universe. It’s been real.